Meaningless Fun
by Pangeo
Summary: My friend Rose finds her way into Middle Earth through the internet. How will this change the plot? Let's see.


Once upon a time there was a girl surfing the internet because there was nothing else to do. She was clicking through her collection of Orlando Bloom sites when she got to this really cool one that she had never seen before. On the homepage it read:  
  
Click Here and You will be Transported into Middle Earth with Legolas.  
  
So since she was so bored she clicked the botton that was obviously a hoax. At first nothing happened, then strange music filled the air (LOTR theme song) and a bright light appreared and instantly she was sucked into her computer screen. (Think Tom Riddles diary scene).  
  
All of a sudden her environment changed and the computer was gone. She was standing in a camp ground with all of the fellowship....  
  
"oh my god! I love you!!!" she went up to legolas a gave him a huge hug. He was so surprised at her sudden appearance that he didn't even get a chance to defend himself from this stangers groping.  
  
"Orlando Bloom! I always wanted to see you, now I have you all to myself"  
  
The rest of the fellowship were at first surprised but now smirked in amusement at the sight.  
  
Finally legolas was able to breathe from her tight grip.  
  
"...Please M'Lady, let go..."  
  
But it seemed that she didn't hear him and again he was at a loss of breath as she began to 'snog' him.  
  
The rest of the fellowship finally decided to come to his aid and pulled her off of him. Then they backed away quickly so as not to be attacked in the same way that Legolas had been.  
  
Legolas rose to his feet, a bit wobbly, a small smile on his face. Rose struggled to get back to her love of her life and managed to tackle him again.  
  
"Who is this mad woman?" asked Gimili. Watching his good friend being savagely snogged by this unusual girl.  
  
"Maybe she is one of those Mary-Sue people whoe fall from the sky and fall in love with Leggy over there" said Pippin. "You can tell by the odd clothing and the names they give us."  
  
"Yeah who is Orlando Bloom any way?"  
  
"Maybe this is all happening because of Saurman casting a spell over us all and having beautiful girls follow us around." suggested Aragorn.  
  
"Could be," said Gandalf. Smoking his pipe. "But this doesn't smell like the work of Saurman."  
  
"Then what?"  
  
"strawberries."  
  
"Whatever you're smoking I want some."  
  
"No I'm serious."  
  
"Me too."  
  
In the meantime Rose was having her way with Legolas. He didn't resist but was rather enjoying the attention.  
  
"I want to get married to you!" exclaimed Rose with a happy smile. "And we can have children, and I can be an elf and we can live happily ever after!"  
  
"Sure, why not."  
  
Then she continued. "But I have to invite all my friends... Nicole and Jackie and..."  
  
"Wait a second? There's more of you?" He stopped to think for a moment, imagining being with several girls at once, then smiling. "I'm in."  
  
"Lucky elf, why does he get all the luck?" complained Sam.  
  
"Because Sam, you're not a handsome, tall, clever, muscular, flexible..." mumbled Frodo, smirking.  
  
"Frodo, is there something you aren't telling me?"  
  
"No of course not," he said while staring blatantly at Legolas.  
  
"I knew it! You always had a thing for him, ever since Rivendell! I'm your Sam! Don't you remember your Sam?"  
  
"Yeah sure whatever,"  
  
Rose followed the fellowship for the whole day, trying to figure out a way to get her friends to this fantasyland as well. While hugging Legolas, of course.  
  
"Gandalf, is there anyway I can get my friends here?" she asked him since he had magical powers.  
  
"Is one of your friends a dashingly handsome and gay fellow?"  
  
"No...."  
  
"Then my answer is no."  
  
"Gandalf!"  
  
"Ok, Ok. Legolas control your friend. There is a way."  
  
"It won't hurt Orland.. I mean Legolas will it?"  
  
"No."  
  
"What do I do?"  
  
"Just stand there and yell out their names."  
  
"That's simple." So Rose, still not letting go of her Leggy stood on the spot where he pointed and yelled out her friends names.  
  
"Nicole! Jackie!"  
  
*pop*  
  
The two friends magically appeared on the spot, looking a bit dazed.  
  
"What the..."  
  
"How..."  
  
"Welcome to Middle Earth."  
  
"Cool! It's Legolas!" Yelled Nicole, pointing.  
  
"And everyone else," noticed Jacquelyn. "Interesting."  
  
"Group hug!" said Rose giving her friends a hug.  
  
"Guess what, I going to get married to Legolas." she bragged.  
  
"Not fair! Cant we all share?" asked Nicole.  
  
"Yes, I agree to this plan... sharing." smiled Legolas.  
  
Jacquelyn was looking at Aragorn. "What about.."  
  
"Remember he gets married Jackie? You can't"  
  
"Oh," she pouted. "But..."  
  
"I said no." stated Nicole.  
  
"Fine."  
  
So the three friends and the Fellowship traveled together, but it didn't take long for the complaints too start.  
  
"Are we there yet?" asked Jacquelyn, feeling the affects of a days walk.  
  
"No," answered Aragorn.  
  
"When will we get there?"  
  
"In thirteen days."  
  
At this Rose let out a cry.  
  
"Thirteen days! What about rest and food and sleep and five star hotels!"  
  
"Come on Rosa, it won't be that bad." Nicole reassured her friend and gestured towards Legolas.  
  
"I guess."  
  
But then she felt the blisters on her feet.  
  
"Why did I click that stupid button? Couldn't it have said:  
  
Click Here and Legolas will be Transported your House, free of charge."  
  
"That's stupid, who would click on a button like that."  
  
"I would."  
  
"Would you believe it?"  
  
"Now I would."  
  
"Are we there yet?"  
  
"I said thirteen days!"  
  
"What's your childhood trauma?" asked Jacquelyn.  
  
"Nothing, go away."  
  
"I think you made him upset," said Nicole.  
  
"I'm sorry, but can we at least rest?"  
  
He finally gave in. "We're stopping for a short time, no more. We need to fulfill our mission."  
  
"Oh yeah, we're in this Lord of the Rings story aren't we?"  
  
"Want to know who dies?"  
  
"NO!" All the fellowship yelled. 


End file.
